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Adventures Beyond the Comfort Zone

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Transmition inturupted...

Special Notice: settings have changed on this blog; you no longer have to be a member of this blogging service to comment on the things I say.

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There have been so many peopole involved in my life lately! It's a wonderful change of pace from the way things were durring the school year.

Actually, work is still kind of lonely, but its the kind where there are still people all around. It's not that the pace is so intence that we can't talk to eachother... it's that the guys I work with live in a different word. ...Someone asks if anyone else is going fishing this weekend; I stay quiet while someone else answers so my geeky plans of Anime don't get laughed at.... People talk about how they can't wait to go home and have a beer; I keep quiet so no one has to be offended that I don't even like the concept of beer.....

A couple days later, I find these few paragraphs still sitting, waiting to be posted... depressed myself and decided to just go to bed. There was a happy part comming, but I'll put that in my next post.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


I need to start seriosly excersizing my blogging skills so that someday, I might have a regular posting schedule.

I got to hear from Alicia only hours after my last post! It was so wonderful just to hear her voice again (n.n).

Oh! and my sister is finaly back home from college! And already she's out looking for a job of her own. (Any praying people out there, keep her in mind, eh?)

Since it's already starting to get light out, it's time to turn in... so I leave you with something I wrote in my journal last night when I tried and fialed to go to bed at a more reasonable hour...

I'm remembering constantly, that I've been meaning to blog about God putting me at Dak. I know that it was Him... It started with a prayer and a coin toss (x3). If they hadn't all come up tails, I would have taken it as a non-sign. Though, even at the time, I had my doubts... I felt much more sure about Him wanting me there, when it turned out that friend-Amanda got the job at Larson's that I turned down. It also turns out that I greatly prefer building electronic road signs to building doors; I have a natural aversion to electronic devices n.n There is also a big diference between building large objects and just producing large quantities of objects.... Oh! And building really big signs sometimes gives me the justification to climb on them a little! The job feels so much more suited to my .... my "me" that it has to have been more than simple coincidence that turned all three pennies up tails after my confused prayer for direction as to whitch job offer to accept.

Maybe I'll just copy and paste this into my blog tomorrow.... I could do it now... but I wanna do some reading before I pass out (which will hopefully be soon..)

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Star Wars blew my mind... and heart (99.9% spoiler free!)

There was so much more emotion than I had expected......... Where do I even begin? (I miss Alicia..)

*** an hour lapses as Kevin watches the thunderstorm in another attmpt to gather his thoughts***
It's been almost a week since i've talked to my girlfriend... Part of the movie helped me to remember how much I miss her, when (near the begining) Anikin reunites with Padme after a short mission (not telling!) ... I felt all gooie inside watching the two run up and hug eachother...

I've never gone this long without being able to at least call her... I wish she'd brought her cell phone... She and Amber, Kim, and Rachel are all visiting friend Laura in South Carolina (The lot of them all went to high school together in Madison) I thought I had Laura's cell number, but I kept getting a voice mail message in someone else's voice...
With the starting of my new job and adjusting to a new sleeping pattern, I hadn't really allowed myself time to think about it... I need an Alicia-hug.....

What really got to me in Revenge of the Sith, is the path that Anikin took to the Dark Side. (not a spoiler... we all know it was his cinimatic destiny) It was frightening just how easy it was to relate to him in what was happening... Put in his place, I would have struggled under the stress of it all too (I don't know who wouldn't...) I'd like to say that I'd have made different choices, but it would be really, really hard...

(Please note: I worked hard to keep this spoiler free. try to do the same with your comments, eh? Thanks!)

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Working Daktronics: Day One

Before I get going today, I just want to cast out a big thank you for the friends who happened to be online the other day when I really needed someone to talk to. Each of you really boosted my spirits in your own special ways. Thank you.

Almost exactly 2 hours ago now, I got off work from my first day of work at Daktronics. An extreme schedule to be sure... in fact, I'm not sure I'll be able to write about it now, but Dad's going through his morning rutine already, so I won't be able to sleep yet anyway, right?

Well it started around 4... sort of. I arrived several minutes early, and discovered that they had already started cycling people through to have their picture taken for our ID badges (not that there were that many people yet... it was mostly college students after all).

After a lot of standing around in an increasingly crouded lobby, most of us were taken to some kind of conference/meeting room, where we waited some more

Eventually, everyone was there so they could start telling us about the company and all of there policies, safety regulations, and so forth.

Several hours later, I was led to the department where I would be working: Transportation. (no, I don't get to drive things around. We make displays that you'd see by the side of the road.) We arived just in time to take our first break.

The atmosphere of the work envrinment was.... not really relaxed... but it felt more so than my last summer job. The orientation process is already over, I just have to keep showing up to my departnent and following directions until I've caught on well enough to work with the team without having to ask questions all the time .... not that I asked many... it all seemed fairly straight forward.

I also get to buy me some nice boots at half price 'tomorrow' (complements of Dak, because I'm a poor college student.) I'll get prescription safety glasses too, but that's not as exciting to me.

That's enough for now... I don't think I'll do this after work anymore... my brain shut down several times, and my spelling is icky..

G'night all, and God bless

Friday, May 13, 2005

The Crest of Friendship

I have missed my friends...

I've spent the last couple days mostly watching episodes of Digimon (season 1 [eBay is a wonderous place!]) And I think that now it's finally safe to say that I've made a full recovery from finals week. Boy was that a long, misserable week... as an end to a bad month.... to finnish of a not so great semester...

don't get me wrong; my grades all came out fine. It was the price I paid to get those grades... It seemed as though I was drifting away from all my friends, as though all my classes were working together to keep me from them... Especially my painting class... It just happened to be scheduled at 7 in the evening, Tuesdays and Thursdays. This meant that I was still in class when the InterVarsity Christian Fellowship (IVCF) had its large group meeting (tues. at 8).

It wasn't until it was too late that I realized just how much I missed it... How I depended on it to connect with people... and with God.... As the weeks went by, I could really feel the difference, really felt disconnected...

I did have other opportunities... a Bible study, a Dicipleship group, and the occational venture into the Gaming Club should I get out of painting early enough on a Thursday night (or thought I could afford to lose the sleep..) But it seemed like there was always something I had to dash off and do as soon as anything ended... no hanging around... Sometimes I was just scared too; afraid I'd already lost what little scraps of social skills I'd had.

I'm not sure where the transition happened, but I began to feel giddy if I thought there was any chance at all that I'd get to hang out with someone... even just lingering a few minutes after church to talk to people. I felt so disconnected.

I guess I finnaly hit my breaking point at the end of the semester, I didn't want to care about school anymore, I just wanted to play games with my friends.... By Wednesday, I had already pushed my way through a huge project for my 3D class (complete with several hours-consuming computer errors), crammed for my Econ final and passed it with nearly airborn colors, crammed for and completed an online exam that prevented me from attending IVCF's annual end-of-the-year bring-your-own-meat BBQ so that I could be ontime to present my final painting and creteque those of others.... (I feel tired just thinking about it...) Wednesday I tried to study for my one remaining final, but I think I did more napping... I was tired, run-down and lonely... so of course I jumped at the chance to play Dungens and Dragons that night.

D&D is not a quick game. The 'short' adventure we played took us until 1am when we got kicked out of the TC. My brain had been telling me for some time that I should have left to finish my cramming, but I didn't care anymore. I wanted to get to know these people, and I wanted to see the game through to the end. I had only made it to two other games this semester, and had left both of them early.

I had a blast, and I felt alive again! My poor girlfriend, Alicia did not, however... so we wound up talking and even praying together for some time afterward on the phone (something else I had missed terribly [a blessing in disguise kind of thing]).

Needless to say, I was quite exauhsted the next day. I did however, see imediate answers to the prayers of the previous night; most of what was on the test were things I had already memorized, and the rest were either things I had looked over the night before or available through an online resource he allowed us to access. Also, there was little danger of falling asleep on my test as I had just sprinted to the test site after waking only ten minutes beforehand (not quite the answer I had expected, but it worked)

Anywho.... I'm sidetracking pretty baddly... sort of. I needed to let all that out anyway. It's my blog; I'll do whatever I feel like! Gosh! ...

So yeah. In spite of nearly-missed-consequences, I believe it was worth the lost sleep. So much so that I did something similar the next night rather than letting myself recover and going to bed early.

A different set of friends happened upon me relaxing in front of a large dorm-TV (not near as important, but something else I had come to miss). They invited me to walk across town to hang out at a 24 hour gas station. It was about 10:30 or so, when my body was saying, "alright, we can watch this show, but I'm way overdue to crash, man." But then I was invited to CitGo, and I'm like, "Pfft! forget that! I haven't hung out with these people all semester! I'm going!"
Again, well worth it. As well was Raelene's appartment-warming party the next afternoon/evening/night. (especially since most all of us slept the first hour or so of it away n_n)

Playing games and talking and just hanging out with people ... those few events were huge to me, starting to fill this massive void that I had allowed to dry up.

Oh! And then there was ... last night? well Wednesday, I decided that I was ready to get out of the house again and scrounged together whoever I could to join me for dinner and a movie. So Tom, Brandi, and I met Alicia and Adam at the local Chinese dining establishment.
We decided we'd been a little slow in ariving to make the 7 O'clock show, so we just took our sweet time eating/hanging out. (we also sought out others to join us, but that didn't work out...)
Another wonderously enjoyable evening, even moreso than the others mentioned, simply because I was more coherent by this time.

So, yeah... bottom line, school is important, but friends are an even bigger part of life. I became an empty-basket-case without them.
I've got a lot of catching up to do. I'm not sure that God made me to be a social butterfly, but I'm positive I wasn't ment to be the social hermit crab I've become. I'm coming back out of my shell!

...hopefully not all of my updates will take this long to write... or read... {insert shameless plug for The Hithiker's Guide to the Galexy here}

Monday, May 09, 2005

So.... I have a blog now.....

I suppose I sould try and say something meaningful now that I'm here... with the whole world watching... *gulp*

I could say it's my sister's fault I'm here, but 'inspiration' would be a much better word. Through her own blog, I've been able to follow allong with the thoughts and events of her life that show me just how much she's grown and changed (all for the better). I have to admit, I'm a little jelous of how quickly she's broken out of her shell... while my own remains wrapped firmly around me... I seem to remember nearly breaking free of it once, but that seems so long ago now...

So, here I come; stretching myself out, being myself out where you can all see me. Reaching out to the man God intended me to be.